The Welcoming Committee

Down at the frat house, the new arrivals must submit to severe initiation rituals when they meet ... the Welcoming Committee. (Masked, costumed seniors have an exposed newcomer surrounded.) Leader: So, you think you have what it takes to bunk in a dorm, do you? We shall see. Blindfold him and spin him around! Now, let's see if he can climb the stairs! Well, what's the matter? Feeling dizzy? Bring him here. Only two steps? That's the worst performance yet. You'll have to make up for it in your next challenge. We're the kind of men who can handle our punch around here and we don't like teetotalers. Give him the funnel! Put that in your mouth and tilt back your head. (A garden hose is aimed into the funnel and purple fluid squirts out.) Now, guzzle the punch! And if a drop falls on the floor you'll lick it up! (The freshman easily gulps down the punch. After the funnel is taken from him he lets out a long burp.) Well then, a punch drinker may know how to stay cool in a crisis, but can he answer the call of duty and kill for his fraternity? Show him the lobster! (A live lobster is brought in in a small tank.) As a final test of your character and loyalty you must boil this lobster alive! Show no mercy!
Comedy Sketches Cartoons Arguments Copyright Issues Lyrics Poems
More Scripts Statements Songs
© 2007, 2014. Scripts by David Skerkowski. All rights reserved.